I Tested The 2 Top Oral Sex-Stimulating Sex Toys To Tell You Which One Is BEST

These sex toys will absolutely rock your world ... I know, because I tried them out!
For the past week, I've had the pleasure of allowing my p*ssy to take one for the team as I tested out two of the best oral sex-simulating vibrators in the sex toy game.
However, I must throw out a full disclaimer reminding you all that it's been quite awhile since I received oral sex, so I'll do my best to reach back to the last time in order to give you a fair comparison. That said, the toys that are up on the chopping block are the Womanizer Plus Size and LELO's "multi-award winning" Ora 2.
1. The Womanizer Plus Size
So, here it goes. Here's the tea. When the OG Womanizer by Epi24 came out, I was NOT in love with it. However, after two minutes with one of their newer models — the Womanizer Plus — it took my breath away... literally.
And because I prefer high and mighty vibrations, it's not often that I find myself feeling this way, even with the softer vibrations of the 12 speeds of intensity
 to choose from.
One of the best parts? It didn't sound like I was operating a jackhammer at a construction site. Even though I lived alone during my first encounter with the Womanizer, I felt self-conscious using it due to the obnoxious noise it made as I tried to focus on getting the damned thing to suck my clitoris properly.

And although all the Womanizers seem to come with a little background noise, the plus version toned it down, making the experience an enjoyable one.

But beyond the multiple orgasms that it provides, it's sexy color and vintage size caught my eye. Emphasis on the color (not a fan of the cheetah print and bedazzled buttons).
Although it has all of the trappings of a '90s cellular device, it's size is truly one of the most surprisingly pleasant features of this vibrator — including the XL suction cup for larger clitorises — unlike its predecessors and other vibrators on the market, the handle featured on the Plus is quite handy in reassuring me that I won't develop a wild case of carpal tunnel from my frequent masturbation. The handle also makes it easy to use this vibrator with a partner.
The downfalls of the Womanizer were undoubtedly the fact that it is not waterproof and although it claims to be a simple cleaning process, the recommended process is a little more in-depth than giving your handy dandy cleaning solution a spray; as they ask that you boil the suctions cups after EVERY use.

That could be a lot of boiling, and with me living at home, I'm not sure I should be cooking up vibrator parts in the middle of our kitchen.
However, with all the amazing and timely updates they continue to undergo, I think that future models might be fully prepared to please in every way possible.
They have finally stepped the overall quality of their product up and they came to play. Overall, the Plus was positively everything that the Womanizer W100
 was not — in size, sound, effectiveness, and overall design  — this vibrator was a win. Now, does it feel like oral sex? I have to say yes, it delivers what seems like a blow of cold air (doubling as a wet lip sensation) and the suction provides a similar sensation that's reminiscent of oral sex.
2. The LELO ORA 2
Of course, nothing can or will feel exactly like the real thing ... other than the real thing, but the ORA 2 does try to replicate it with a circular faux tongue motion. But that wasn't the most disappointing aspect of the LELO — the disappointing aspect would be that it just wasn't user-friendly.
And, while I initially thought this had to do with my being a lazy lay, I saw other user reviews that confessed this toy took a little playing with (how ironic) in order to find the pleasure in it. And really, if a toy involves too much fidgeting and uncertainty, making it feel like work, then I tend to get discouraged.

 

Granted there's a good chance I just don't know where my clitoris is, but I like to believe that after all the location changes I made, I would've eventually pinned the tail on the donkey. I even pulled out the lube to offset my vagina before I suffered a rug burn.
But after a little practice and a break, I came back to the ORA 2 with an open mind, ready to explore as I genuinely wanted to fall in love with the jaw-dropping, 'o'-inducing head game that some marketing genius made this toy out to be, however, like a woman past her prime (by societal standards) at a holiday gathering, it was still a disappointment.
Since I often find myself questioning my judgment, I searched the web to see what other sex bloggers had to say and oh boy, I am quite generous, but sex blogger Hey Epiphora said exactly what I thought, but continued to brush aside those concerns with thoughts that perhaps my vagina had adapted to such heavy vibration that it was numb to all the normal type sh*t but no — being f*cked by the ORA 2 was like receiving oral from know-nothing guy with a nub for a tongue — it couldn't find my clitoris if I put a bullseye on it.
I had to wiggle and worm my way to an orgasm with this toy, and while that's okay when it's a plus, it's not okay when it's the standard and mandatory to get off.
All that aside, the toy does feel amazingly smooth providing a skin-like silicone that would feel great against a more powerful vibration and overall tongue motion.
OK, so the toy is waterproof, which would be hella exciting if the vibration — even at it's top tier, tenth speed — didn't feel like I was being punctured by a micropenis. Epiphora puts it best:

"I’m only willing to chase an orgasm on one setting of this toy — full circle with steady vibration. The chances of my orgasm being ruined are high enough without suffering through one of the other modes."
She later added, "At its best, held correctly and on just the right setting and while holding your breath, the LELO Ora 2 is like a pleasant massage chair for your clit. At its worst, it’s a frustrating, expensive, technological nightmare that makes masturbation harder than it needs to be. A few good orgasms when the stars align are not worth $189."

To keep it short and sweet, the toy didn't exemplify the quality that the brand has been known for in the past.
So, the conclusion is: If you're looking into either of these toys, I'd 100 percent suggest spending the extra money to get the Womanizer — no regrets there.

5 Times It's Perfectly OK For You To Fake An Orgasm

Seriously. You're allowed.
Hey, guess what, men who hate it when we fake our orgasms?
THAT'S TOO DAMN BAD.
Nothing drives me more bonkers than a man who gets pissy about women faking orgasms.
Guess what, you run the free world, make more money than we do, and have more rights:
So leave our sexual responses alone.
I don't get why men care!
You're getting laid! We're having a good time! Or maybe we aren't, I don't know, but you are still getting laid.
If a woman decides that faking an orgasm is the way she has to go in a given sexual encounter, that's her prerogative!
If something as foul and dangerous as "stealthing" can be a new sexual trend, women faking an orgasm whenever they damn well want to shouldn't even have anyone batting an eye!

Our orgasms are not proof that you are a sex god. They don't mean your penis is a divine gift. It means we had an orgasm.
That's it. 

If you're a woman and you want to fake an orgasm, there are times it is absolutely okay to do just that, no matter what anyone else might tell you.
I've picked my top five reasons for faking an orgasm and shared them below, but these are just five out of five million!
Every single reason you have to fake an orgasm is good, provided it is your own decision and one that is making you happy.
Seriously. You're allowed.
Hey, guess what, men who hate it when we fake our orgasms?
THAT'S TOO DAMN BAD.
Nothing drives me more bonkers than a man who gets pissy about women faking orgasms.
Guess what, you run the free world, make more money than we do, and have more rights:
So leave our sexual responses alone.
I don't get why men care!
You're getting laid! We're having a good time! Or maybe we aren't, I don't know, but you are still getting laid.
If a woman decides that faking an orgasm is the way she has to go in a given sexual encounter, that's her prerogative!
If something as foul and dangerous as "stealthing" can be a new sexual trend, women faking an orgasm whenever they damn well want to shouldn't even have anyone batting an eye! 

Our orgasms are not proof that you are a sex god. They don't mean your penis is a divine gift. It means we had an orgasm.
That's it.
If you're a woman and you want to fake an orgasm, there are times it is absolutely okay to do just that, no matter what anyone else might tell you.
I've picked my top five reasons for faking an orgasm and shared them below, but these are just five out of five million!
Every single reason you have to fake an orgasm is good, provided it is your own decision and one that is making you happy.
To the list! It's OK to fake an orgasm when ...
1. ... you're in a rush.
There is more to sex than having an orgasm!
Sometimes I have sex, and orgasm isn't even on my mind.
Sometimes it's just for that quick connection, that reminder of my bond with my partner. 

If you guys have five minutes and you want to have sex and you don't want to have explain how sex is about more than having an orgasm to your partner when he could just be tearing off your panties with his teeth, fake an orgasm.
2. ... you're trying to get pregnant.
Guys actually have better sex when they think their partner has had an orgasm.
If you're trying to get pregnant, faking an orgasm can actually help convince your partner that you have more "need" for his sperm.
That "need" message sends another message, a message to produce more healthy semen.
Fake away!
3. ... you're tired
He wants to get freaky, but you want to get sleepy?
Fake an orgasm.
Seriously, he won't know, his ego won't be bruised, and you guys can both get to bed on time.
Dudes lie about everything. You want to lie about being sexually fulfilled in order to get eight hours instead of seven? Be my guest.
4. ... it isn't gonna happen.
He came hours ago and now your genitals are going numb at his lackluster oral skills?
Can you only come thanks to cervical orgasms and he isn't providing?
Fake it, kick him out, order a pizza, watch Body Heat and get the job done yourself with your favorite sex toy.
It's not lying to tell a random hookup that you came. It's just good manners, particularly when neither of you wants to be all up in each other's bits anymore.
5. ... you don't want to talk about it anymore.
I think it's amazing when a dude is sensitive, loving, and attentive in bed.
I love it when he asks about where to touch you, and how.
But sometimes, in spite of his best efforts, it can feel like you are driving in circles.
You start to feel less like a woman being fucked and more like a piece of Ikea furniture that just isn't being put together the right way.
You wanna fake it? You go right ahead!
6. ... you've never had an orgasm. 

When you have an orgasm, your muscles contract.
When you fake an orgasm, you are faking the contraction of those muscles.
You know how you go to the gym and add a little bit of weight and then a little bit more? You're training your muscles.
The same with faking it.
If you can't have an orgasm, but you perfected faking it, you're actually training your body to HAVE an orgasm.
Swear to god, this is how I finally had one!
Basically, if you want to fake having an orgasm — go ahead and fake it! It's your body and your sexual experience, and while making your partner happy can be a huge part of that (and there's not a thing wrong with it), you need to prioritize your own needs in bed.

If that means faking it, so be it!

5 Sex Positions Guaranteed To Get Him To The Finish Line ASAP

99 problems and his penis is one.
Making a man have an orgasm quickly is not a thing I ever thought I would be writing about.
Sex is supposed to be fun, not a race we are eager to see be over as quickly as possible.
That said, some nights couples get stuck in a rut, and that rut is your vagina and the same old sad sex positions you've been using to get the job done forever.
There are other occasions where you might want your dude to finish up a little bit faster, too. Let's say he's popped one of his friend's secret erection pills, or he's drunk enough to be stupidly horny but too drunk to actually make anything happen.
There are also forms of erectile dysfunction that can make it difficult for a man to reach orgasm.

If you find yourself in a position like this, it's your positions that need work.
Your sex positions, that is. 

I've rounded up a few trusty sex positions to make him orgasm faster than ever before. In fact, he might climax so quickly you'll run the risk of being disappointed. But hey, you get what you ask for, friendos.
1. Doggy style sex position
This sex position is king. In fact, in a prior relationship, we had to give this one a hard pass because it was just too hard for my dude to stay, well, hard for very long.

Doggy style gives your man maximum thrust and all kinds of friction. It's ideal for ensuring that he gets an orgasm that's just as intense as it is speedy in its arrival.
2. Adjusted missionary position
It's hard to believe that any sex position with the word "missionary" in the title could help him have an orgasm faster than usual, but this ain't your grandmother's missionary (also, I am sorry I mentioned your grandmother.)

In adjusted missionary your legs go on his shoulders, tightening your hold on his penis and allowing him a maximum depth of thrust. That's all a big technical way of saying, look out, he's going to blow. 
3. Musical chairs
This one is a true winner and although the night might sound childlike, this is entirely X-Rated. 

Mount your partner while he is seated in his favorite chair. Climb onto his lap and hook your legs over the chair's arms. It gives you all the control and delight of being on top, with the added depth he needs to really come quickly.
4. The mantis
This is another form of adjusted missionary sex that really hits the spot, pun absolutely intended and relished because I am a total dork.
During missionary sex, roll slightly to the side of your choice. Wrap your legs around your man letting him spread his own legs slightly allowing him to get deep inside of you without losing any of that tightness he so enjoys.
5. Oral sex 

Blowjobs in any imaginable position done properly are a great way to make sure he has a fast, powerful orgasm, especially on days when you don't feel up for having full-on penetrative sex.
Some men have a difficult time having an orgasm, so check in with your man about how exactly his body responds to a blowjob before you go doling them out all willy-nilly.

10 EXTREMELY Honest Women Reveal Their Ultimate, Dirty, X-Rated Turn-Ons

And they aren't holding back.
Ahh, the art of seduction. It really is an art. And many men fancy themselves artists, but surely you can't all be Van Gogh. When it the last time you actually seduced a woman?
These women told us what makes any women turned on for sex. Whether you think you are an expert or not, it's always good to remember what women like in bed.
We spoke with ten women who told us what really turns them on.
"Striptease. But it must be sensual, no jokes! It's so good to watch my partner showing off his body just for me." —G.A., 28
"On the first date it's nice if the guy acts according to our vibe. When the woman is shy it's important to move slower, in a soft and tender way. But if she is hornier, he should move on without holding back!" —N.O.F., 28
"It's awesome when a guy offers you sex toys. Why should we always be the ones who buy this stuff?" —C.H.S, 31

"No woman can resist an erotic massage. That one that goes from head to toe, really slowly, you know? It drives us crazy!" —M.P., 33
"Having sex in unusual places. Start warming up in a public space, where no one is watching but there is a chance that someone shows up. Adrenaline is a great libido booster." —J.M.O., 30 years old
"Holding off ejaculation. When it's good, why should we hurry? You notice the guy penetrating you deeply and about to come, and then he suddenly slows down and starts it over again." —R.A., 19
"I love guys who speak during sex. Who call me hot, compliment my performance, ask what they want me to do, and whisper. What could be better than knowing that you are giving him pleasure?" —D.D.S., 40
"Oral sex is the ultimate turn on for me, for sure! He must know how to alternate between soft and hard tongue, relaxed kisses, suction, and pay attention to what I respond better to. That always works." —A.C.R., 35
"Amateur porn movies. The professional ones are a turn off sometimes, because they are very artificial. But when he chooses some amateur movies, the ones you find on the internet, we watch it and touch ourselves and it's so good." —N.G., 31

"Once I dated a guy who took me to a motel room and we showered together. I have never thought that receiving a soft massage with a washcloth, warm water and some body wash through the hands of a man would make me so horny." —T.M., 28
See more things that turn women on in this video:
Wow, so now that you've got some inspiration. Seduce her!

The REAL Reason He's Prematurely Ejaculating (And How To Stop It)

A look into the science of sex.
About a third of all men have problems with premature ejaculation (PE). This is often very upsetting both to the man and his partner when it happens. But when you understand what is happening in the body during the sexual arousal cycle it’s much easier to choose effective treatments for PE.
The sexual arousal cycle was discovered by sex experts William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson. Their discoveries are just as relevant today as they were back in the 1960s. They discovered the cycle by directly observing and filming people engaged in sexual activity while recording what was happening in the body during sexual intercourse.
The Phases of Sexual Arousal
Masters and Johnson found that there are four phases to the Sexual Arousal Cycle and intercourse:

Before looking at these four phases and the importance of each in understanding and overcoming PE, we need to understand what’s happening in the nervous system during sexual activity. During sex, the body is controlled by what’s called the autonomic nervous system.
The Automatic Body
The autonomic nervous system controls all the basic processes of the body such as heart rate, breathing, digestion, getting sexually aroused, and having an orgasm. There are two parts to the system and they balance each other. They are:

The sympathetic system
The parasympathetic system
Those terms can be confusing to most people, but what it boils down to is that the sympathetic system is in charge of activity. When you’re exercising or working hard, the sympathetic system is running the body. When you’re resting and taking it easy the parasympathetic system is in charge. We can sum up by saying:
The sympathetic system is the action system.
The parasympathetic system is the rest system.
The action system speeds up the heart and makes you breathe faster. The rest system slows down the heart and breathing. In general, the two systems have opposite effects. For example, the rest system is in charge of digestion. That’s why we often feel sleepy after a big meal as the stomach is starting the process of digestion.
But the action system works against the rest system and interferes with the process of digestion. That’s why heavy exercise after a big meal can lead to a serious case of indigestion. Instead of moving through your intestines, the food just sits there and pretty soon you don’t feel too good.
The difference between the action and rest systems is important for understanding sexual function and PE because during the Sexual Arousal Cycle, we shift back and forth between the action and the rest systems. Now it’s time to look at how the four phases of the Sexual Arousal Cycle work.

Phase 1: The Arousal\

Sexual activity begins with the Arousal Phase where a man gets turned on and begins to develop an erection while the woman begins to lubricate. This is a function of the rest or parasympathetic system. For this phase to work well, you have to be relaxed.

If you are overwhelmed with worries or concerned about your ability to successfully have intercourse, it’s difficult to get turned on. But when the two of you are relaxed and tuned into your increasing, sexual feelings, the woman gets lubricated and the man develops an erection. This is the period of foreplay.
For men who have extreme problems with PE, orgasm can occur during this phase. Only about 1 to 2 percent of men experience PE to this extent. The problem is that the feelings of arousal quickly trigger the orgasmic reflex.
The man who experiences this early orgasm is as disappointed as the woman because the orgasmic release is usually not accompanied by the expected feelings of intense pleasure.
Men report that it seemed to just happen and wasn’t very satisfying. The men are then left unable to continue with intercourse and feel like a failure. We’ll talk about the solution to this along with the more common type of PE a little later in this article.

Phase 2: The Plateau
In the Plateau Phase, the man enters the woman and they engage in the rhythm of sexual intercourse. This usually lasts from 3 to 5 minutes or longer. During this phase, the couple experiences waves of sexual pleasure that get more and more intense.
The parasympathetic or rest system is in charge during the Plateau phase. However, with intercourse, excitement increases and the sympathetic or action system starts to take over. Alternating between the action and rest systems is crucial to understanding the most common type of PE.
Over a lifetime, about 30 percent of men experience either temporary or long-term PE. For most of them, the problem occurs during the Plateau Phase. At some point, there is a shift into orgasm before the man wants to.

Often, the woman feels frustrated at this point and the man may try to help her have an orgasm with manual stimulation. This works for some couples, but not all.
Phase 3: The Orgasm
As sexual intensity increases during the Plateau Phase, the orgasmic reflex takes over and there is a shift from the rest system of the body to the action system. This was one of Masters' and Johnson’s most important discoveries.

During the first two phases of sexual activity — the Arousal and the Plateau phases — the rest system of the body is in charge. But when orgasm begins the action system takes over. The heart rate shoots up and breathing becomes very intense.
The two systems feel very different. During the Plateau Phase, there is a sense of increasing pleasure and warmth. The shift to the action system during orgasm introduces very intense feelings, powerful muscle contractions and sweating on parts of the body like the palms of the hand and the soles of the feet.
Men who experience PE during the Plateau Phase often try to fight the increasing sexual pleasure to hold off from having an orgasm. This can work for a while but often they find themselves overwhelmed by the increasingly intense feelings and suddenly slip into orgasm.
The key to dealing with PE lies in understanding, experiencing and being able to stay in the pleasant, relaxed feelings of the Plateau Phase without shifting into the much more intense feelings of the action system in the Orgasmic Phase.

Men who have mastered the shift from arousal to orgasm are able to stay with and focus on the pleasant feelings they are sharing with their partner during the Plateau Phase so they don’t suddenly shift into the Orgasmic Phase.
They don’t fight against pleasure. They use the pleasurable drifting feeling of the Plateau Phase to delay the onset of the much more intense feelings of the Orgasmic Phase.
Before we talk about how to stay with the relaxed pleasure of the Plateau Phase, let’s look at the final phase of the sexual arousal cycle.
Phase 4: The Resolution
After orgasm, there is a shift from the action system back to the rest system. At this point, the man enters the Resolution Phase and usually feels intensely relaxed. He may even fall asleep. It may be a while before he can have an erection again. This is called the Resolution Phase.

For men in their teens, this phase may last a minute or so. Later in life, it may take up to a day before a man can have another erection and for a man’s in his 70s or older, it may take two days or more before he is able to have another erection.
This is why an early orgasm can be so frustrating, especially when it happens before intercourse begins. The desire to continue is there, but the physical ability to have an erection disappears for a while. The spirit is willing, but the body is unable to perform.
This brings us to the very important topic of learning how to prevent a premature orgasm. The solution on how to stop premature ejaculation lies not in fighting against sexual pleasure, but in learning the difference in feeling between arousal and orgasm.
1. Delay the point of inevitability. 
As a man moves from arousal to orgasm there is a point where the feelings become so intense that it is almost impossible to stop the orgasm from happening. This is called the point of inevitability. It is also called the point of no return.
Treatments for PE focus on keeping a man in the arousal phase and delaying the point of inevitability. One way is to try to reduce the intensity of sexual feelings. For example, applying numbing cream to the penis lowers the level of sexual pleasure and can help delay the onset of the point of inevitability.

Some herbal formulas increase feelings of relaxation and this can help a man stay in the relaxed arousal phase instead of shifting too quickly into the action system and the orgasmic phase. Some doctors prescribe antidepressants because they have the effect of reducing sexual desire and lowering the intensity of sexual feelings.
One advantage that herbal formulas have is that they do not have some of the undesirable side effects of antidepressant drugs. But both types of treatments can help a man delay the onset of the point of inevitability.
2. Practice.
One way to do this is to practice masturbating without trying to have an orgasm right away. Most men try to come as quickly as possible when they masturbate. In this exercise, a man gets turned on and then stops before he has an orgasm.

Doing this several times in a row and concentrating on the feelings of pleasure helps a man learn the difference between staying in the Plateau Phase versus suddenly slipping into the Orgasmic Phase. Of course, one problem with this is that some men are very uncomfortable with masturbation or have religious beliefs that prevent it.
3. Self Hypnosis
When used properly self-hypnosis can help a man identify the feelings of deep relaxation and combine them with erotic imagery and the feelings of sexual pleasure. In self-hypnosis, a man can drift in a state of sexual pleasure instead of just getting turned on and suddenly moving into orgasm.
Self-hypnosis can also be used in conjunction with other treatments that your medical doctor may recommend.
Whatever it is, it must support sexual arousal in a way that allows a man to practice staying in the relaxed state instead of slipping into the point of inevitability. The ability to drift in a state of sexual pleasure and enjoy those feelings is what sets men who can delay orgasm apart from those who don’t have any sense of control.
Any long-term solution to the problem of PE involves learning the difference between feelings of relaxed sexual arousal and the intense sensations of orgasm. By learning to stay pleasantly aroused, a man can stop fighting against sexual pleasure and learn to enjoy the moment in a relaxed way. This is the pathway to a permanent solution for PE.

3 Types Of Vaginal Orgasms (And How to Have Each One)

And yes — you can have more than one at once!
It’s insane to me that we never received any education on how to be exceptional lovers (I mean, why learn about love, connection, and intimacy when there’s algebra and a history of wars to memorize, amirite?).
We were not only left in the dark on women’s orgasms, but we absorbed messages from the media that led us to believe that they are incredibly complex, confusing and impossible to understand to any degree.
Male sexuality is relatively straightforward. We have one rod, in plain sight, which you basically stimulate one way and produce one kind of orgasm. Women, however, have multiple points of arousal that are hidden from view, scattered internally and fluctuate with mood – which can make it seem like hunting for buried treasure without a map… and with a blindfold on… and with the belief that only 1% of beaches even have treasure that can be discovered.
The truth is that women are also relatively easy to figure out. It’s just that nobody ever handed us that map. With some general knowledge and the right energetic approach, you can pick this up and help her to reach new levels of sexual pleasure.
Women have three main types of vaginal orgasm. Most guys are only aware of one or two of the three. And the vast majority of women have only experienced one, maybe two, as well. Whatever the reasons may be, our culture has muted the conversation on the full potentials of female sexual pleasure, leaving us ignorant to this wide, juicy world of possibilities.
But I say NO MORE! It’s time for you to feel more capable, and it’s time for her to feel all the pleasure that she possibly can, and deserves to, experience.

I’m going to break down all three orgasms: clitoral, G-spot, and cervical. We’re going to talk about what they are and how to trigger each of them. This will take some exploration, but mastering all three is a knack that anyone can develop.
The Keys To Success: Communication & Wildness
Free-flowing, open conversation is absolutely essential here (because remember, sex is about feeling and connecting more than it is about technique).
Seeing as how women are not a monolith, each woman has slightly different preferences for the exact position and angle of your fingers/mouth/the toy, as well as the pressure and speed at which you use them. Or maybe they want you to hold them or talk in a certain way that pushes their buttons.
Between having talked so little about this as a culture and not wanting to look bad in her eyes, some guys are very shy and hesitant around directly asking about her preferences, as well as sharing their own. But this is a crucial part of mastering the process and having both of you experience maximum sexual pleasure. Plus, she’s often just as shy about asking for what she wants because she doesn’t want you to think that she’s not happy, or subtly trying to tell you that you’re doing a bad job (dude’s egos can be fragile). So to manage each others’ feelings, and avoid a potentially awkward conversation, you both hold back and mutually end up with less than amazing sex.
If we can drop our egos, ask, listen, and be willing to be teachable, our confidence and pleasure levels will shoot through the roof in no time at all.
There’s far too much emotional caretaking and self-preservation happening in our bedrooms. Between the sheets, we’re meant to be naked with each other in all senses of the word; to be vulnerable, free, and unapologetically sensual.

This caretaking dynamic is also counterproductive to getting into the energetic state that breeds great orgasms: freedom and wildness.
The best sex happens when we’re in our bodies and out of our heads. We’re not second-guessing ourselves, what to do, or what the other person is thinking. You surrender fully to them, as well as to your primal impulses — acting from passion rather than a manual. You both feel completely free to fully be yourselves, knowing that you’ll never be judged for anything you do, say, or desire.
So let go of the idea that a real man is supposed to “just know how to do it”, as if you were performing a magic trick and embrace the reality that unleashed, epic sex is achieved in concert with the other person – through feedback and dialogue. Realize that asking what she likes isn’t a sign of being an inexperienced boy, but rather a mature, outstanding, and confident sexual partner.
1. Clitoral orgasm
The clitoris is the most well known female erogenous zone. It’s the most superficial both in terms of being the easiest to find, and also the lightest intensity. It like the warm-up “hey-how-are-ya” meet and greet orgasm. That said, paired with additional internal stimulation, it can compound to trigger huge, full, rounded orgasms. Many women need simultaneous clitoral stimulation to trigger their other, deeper types of orgasms as well.
Most guys think the clitoris is just this pea-shaped thing at the top of the vaginal opening, cloaked by a little fleshy hood. Although that’s definitely a key part, it’s actually only the tip of it. Like an iceberg, most of the clitoris is beneath the surface.

That first bit is basically shaped like a really small penis. It has a super sensitive head at the end of a shaft that swells up when she’s turned on. You can even use two fingers to stroke that shaft, and it feels just as good, if not better. The clitoris, after all, has more than twice the nerve endings than the penis. So the sensations are a lot more intense.
From there, there are two wishbone-shaped arms that run down either side of her vaginal opening. These sit on top of/outside small bulbs, which you can feel just inside her on the left and right vaginal walls. These also swell upon arousal and are what make the opening of her vagina feel so soft, tight, and juicy on penetration.
It’s always best to take your time before getting into any direct and/or rapid stimulation. Start with a sensual massage. Caress and kiss her all over. Practice extended foreplay. Tease and lightly touch/stroke the areas around the tip of the clit, rather than jumping right on it.
The best and most comfortable ways to work are while lying beside her, her lying on top facing upward, or her leaning back on you while sitting up on the bed. Not only can you naturally reach down and stroke her clitoris with greater ease, but you can hold her tight, lick and kiss her neck and whisper in her ear at the same time, which bumps up the intensity a few notches.
While the clit and internal arousal points are good to focus on, keep in mind that they are connected to the rest of her nervous system. The massaging of a breast, lick of a nipple, and bite of the neck will majorly enhance her experience and add to the overall swelling energy that tips her over into orgasm.
Don’t just put blinders on and obsess over this one spot. Try everything, get a little wild, and see what makes her gasp and moan. Ask, listen, refine, repeat.

2. G-spot orgasm
The G-spot was found by the gynecologist Ernst Gräfenberg. Hence it was given its name, “G-spot”. He found that repeated stimulation of this spot (a disc of spongey tissue about 1.5 inches inside the vagina on the upper wall) yielded deep sexual arousal, powerful orgasms and — sometimes — female ejaculation.
T
his type of orgasm requires more warming up, focus, trust, and surrender on both your part, for multiple reasons.
The G-spot orgasm can result in squirting, or be preceded by the sensation of having to pee. To get past the withhold and social taboo around squirting, she will need to feel comfortable both within herself and with you in order to fully embrace the possibility of that happening.
There was also a scientific article posted recently which shows that women have more/better/deeper orgasms with men who are warm, accepting, creative, and good-humored. This gives further support to the idea that the degree to which she can let go in your presence is directly related to how easily and deeply she’ll climax.
Like the clitoral orgasm, you want to start with light pressure and slowly work your way up to firm pressure (and then eventually full throttle).
Mixing stimulation and bouncing back and forth between the G-spot and clitoris can be powerful as well. Just make sure to focus your attention on the G-spot and don’t move away too often. It takes some momentum and consistency to bring this one about. And if you play your cards right, you should be able to bring about multiple.
Once she reaches a climax, it’s always a good rule of thumb to refrain from stimulation for 5-10 seconds and press your whole palm against her clit and vaginal opening. A “grounding palm”, as it’s referred to, serves a dual purpose. Firstly, it makes her feel supported and secure, and provides a little space for her to really feel the orgasmic wave ripple through her body. Secondly, as her hips rock involuntarily, the simple static contact of the palm provides just enough gentle stimulation that can set off aftershock orgasms.
As mentioned, it could get wet, so it’s always good to have a few towels on hand.

3. Cervical orgasm
The orgasmic pot-of-gold. Often disputed and rarely experienced, the cervical orgasm is by far the deepest and most intense vaginal orgasm. It often results in a sustained full-body sense of tingling and a shimmering of pure sensation.
Where the clitoral orgasm may last for a few seconds, a cervical orgasm can last for several minutes. In fact, I once personally had a partner have a cervical orgasm through the duration of an entire 5+ minute song (it was a Kings Of Leon song… in case you were wondering).
Due to their intensity, these can also be accompanied with an emotional release. It’s almost like a neurological earthquake — it can rattle her so hard that repressed emotion is broken loose and ventilated. Just hold her if this happens. Be patient, gentle, and accepting, and she’ll come out the other side feeling 50 pounds lighter.
Deep penetration is required to trigger this orgasm. It can be done with fingers, but usually a sex toy or well-positioned penis works best.
The cervix is a cylindrical bottleneck of tissue that connects the vagina to the uterus. If you run your finger from the G-spot all the way up and as far back into her as you can reach, you might be able to feel a round firm button. It’s almost what it might be like to feel a belly button from the inside.
A woman needs to feel completely open and clear with her intimate partner in order to access a cervical orgasm. In a way, it’s a barometer for how well you’re communicating and processing your emotional friction.
They also say that a lot of women’s trauma is stored in the cervix, so it can be difficult to soften if a woman isn’t doing her own emotional work. But if she’s stepping up to the plate in her life and actively working with her psyche, this is absolutely available to any woman who wants to surrender that deeply into her pleasure with a safe and skilled lover.
That said, stimulation of the cervix doesn’t feel comfortable for every woman, especially at first. But as she becomes more open and aroused, it can begin to feel like an exclamation point rather than a question mark. Trying this during the first few weeks of her cycle can help as well, since that tends to be when the cervix is at it’s least sensitive.
There are two ideal positions for cervical stimulation:
Doggy style

Cowgirl/reverse cowgirl
This is going to require a lot of awareness and communication on her part. Only she can know her comfort level and where “the spot” is for her at that time. Different types and angles of stimulation will feel better on different days.
But when it happens, this is the kind of orgasm that neither of you will ever forget. As a guy, I can’t tell you exactly how it feels (my partners have most frequently used the words ‘pure sensation’ and ‘shimmering’ while describing it), but I can say that it’s wickedly sexy and beautiful to watch.
4. BONUS: Combination orgasms
It’s not uncommon for her to have a few of these orgasms compound simultaneously. Clitoral and cervical, g-spot and clitoral, or even all three at once.
As mentioned above, some women find they need some clitoral stimulation to trigger these deeper orgasms. While you’re penetrating her, have her stimulate her clitoris and mix it in as feels right to her.
Female orgasms might be more nuanced and numerous than in males, but they’re not as difficult as they’re made out to be. Just by reading this and getting a general layout, your sexual IQ and efficacy have already been significantly boosted way out of the norm. From here, it all comes down to real-world calibration (woohoo, homework!) and developing a feel for it.

The 7 Different Orgasms Every Woman Should Have Before She Dies

How many Os have you had?
The female orgasm has long been cloaked in mystery.
Did anyone else just picture their vagina wearing some kind of Eyes Wide Shut style cape, or was it just me?
Why all the secrecy about how and why we cum? Because the female orgasm has long been ignored, denied, and suppressed due to our ol' enemy The Patriarchy.
But the female orgasm is very much a thing. And the more scientists study it (I like to think I help by contributing all of my orgasms to science regularly) the more confounded and amazed they are by what they uncover.
Did you know that there are currently 7 types of known female orgasm? I know! It's nuts! And this list doesn't even factor in that time I once sneezed one an airplane and am fairly sure I came, so. Make of that what you will.
1. Nipple Orgasm

Playing with your nipples can activate the same pleasure centers as your clitoris. Work alone or with a partner and you might find yourself one of the lucky few who can come by nipple play alone.
I APPLAUD AND ENVY YOU.
2. G-Spot Orgasm
Ah, the G-Spot. To access this whopper of a pleasure center use a finger or two and make a "come hither" gesture against your wall.
You'll brush up against a ridge-covered, sponge like surface. Keep brushing and "come hither" will take on a whole new meaning.
3. Clitoral Orgasm
This is cumming for beginners, but that doesn't make it any less awesome. This is the most nerve-filled part of a woman's anatomy. Even gentle pressure can feel like too much pressure.
Clits FTW.
4. A-Spot Orgasm

I've never experienced this one, have you? Apparently the A-Spot is located just about the G-Spot. It's best activated AFTER an orgasm.
Get in missionary position and have your partner engage in quick, firm, thrusts for full effect. Mama Mia.
5. Anal Orgasm
You've got two sphincters at the base of your anus (mine are named Bea and Dolly). When you cum they contract anyway. A finger or a toy employed during the act can heighten that sensation and see you to Sex Enjoyment Island by way of the Butt Express.
6. Urethral Orgasm
You know how sometimes during sex you kind of feel like you might pee? That's because of stimulation to this, the "U-Spot", and the uber sensitive tissue surrounding its opening. Proceed with exuberance and caution.
7. Vaginal Orgasm

THIS IS A MYTH. I mean, I am a reporter here to give you all of the information that exists.
Some women (I have never met one) claim that penetrative sex over a prolonged amount of time can lead to intense vaginal orgasms. Maybe this happens for you, but I kind of feel like maybe it is just your body shuddering and giving up the ghost of a real orgasm being achieved.
Yes, yes. Your vagina is full of ghosts.
Have you had all 7?