What You Actually Learn From Sex With A Married Man

There’s something about a forbidden romance that just turns people on. Whether it’s the secrecy, the mystery, or the passion, being with someone you shouldn’t be with can be exciting, but also has the potential to blow up in your face. Don't you want the cookie even more after your mom told you that you can't have it? That's kind of how illicit affairs begin. Desire. Someone’s heart is bound to get broken no matter how careful you think you’re being. It's guaranteed. Here, three women confess what it was like to be in a relationship with a married man, and what they learned from the experience.

Cheating. Cheating is wrong and we all know that, yet for some reason we can’t help but do it anyways. For some reason, our brains are wired to want what we can’t have and unfortunately, sometimes what we want is a man in a committed relationship.

Taboo. “The forbidden and the taboo is one of the biggest turn-ons for people. They’re not trying to steal him, or take him, but it’s appealing that he is unavailable. She’s thinking that being with this guy is ideal because he’s not going to want more from her because he’s already is married,” Dr. Michael Aaron tells Cosmopolitan.

Band. People cheat and get involved with unavailable people for a slew of reasons, but it’s safe to say that they rarely end well. Paula from Philadelphia says that she got involved with a married man after she joined a band. He was also one of the band’s members and they immediately hit it off.

Chemistry. "I was drawn to him because he was super funny, cool, stylish, sweet, generous, kind, caring, creative, and artistic, not to mention quirky and adventurous. There was obviously chemistry, but I was a little uncomfortable at first about him being married, which continued into our relationship,” says Paula, as reported by Cosmopolitan.

Relationship. Paula says she went along with it however, because the man had reassured her that he and his wife had a somewhat open relationship and was totally ok with it. They began spending more and more time together and things were good at first, until he told his wife about their relationship.

End. "When he eventually told her, it turned out she wasn’t OK with it. The relationship ended awfully. He has told me not to message or contact him again, and I haven’t seen him since. It’s been almost a year now,” says Paula, as reported by Cosmopolitan.

Consequences. After the relationship was over, Paula was able to reflect on it and learned that she doesn’t agree with the “home-wrecker” stereotype and thinks that some people genuinely aren’t looking to break up a relationship. Like herself, a lot of women are truly in denial that things will work out without any negative consequences.

Two sides. Sally is a 28-year-old woman from Virginia who learned that there are always two sides to a story when it comes to being with a cheater. She’d started to form a relationship with a co-worker who was ten years her senior, but because of the way he made her feel at work, she quickly fell for him.

Abuse. "It was after our first kiss he told me that he was married. I couldn't believe it. It was like, ‘With all this time that we spend together, how could you have a wife?’ Then he started explaining how she was verbally abusive and I felt bad for him. I rationalized his wife away,” says Sally, via Cosmopolitan.

Manipulative. But in the end, Sally quickly realized that he was just as manipulative as he had made his wife seem. He tried to change her, not just mentally, but physically as well, trying to convince her to get plastic surgery. In the end, she broke things off with him but not before he put her through so much emotional abuse.

Reminder. "After we broke up, he tried to repair things with his wife, and that didn't work, and I think he realized very quickly that no sane woman would deal with his enormous ego for how little he gives in return. I can't stand him, and he's nothing but a constant reminder of all the mistakes I made and how low my self-esteem was at the time to have put up with him for so long,” says Sally, as reported by Cosmopolitan.

Gym teacher. Finally, Hope from Boston tells Cosmopolitan that a few years after graduating high school, she had an affair with her former gym teacher, who was married and had two kids. After reconnecting with him on the internet, she began to have an affair with him that lasted for a bout four months.

Twisted. "This guy has a wife who is a fitness model and two kids. He especially got off on the twisted idea of having sex in his bed at home, going so far as to sneak me in when his wife was out training. He'd talk to me about wanting to see me out in a restaurant when he was with his wife, and meet me in the bathroom. At first, I felt evil and uncomfortable. I was an accessory, and I acted like one — I was young and at the time didn’t really know better,” said Hope, as reported by Cosmopolitan.

Clingy. However after he started becoming more and more clingy, she decided to end things. She realized that a crush she’d had in high school was what initially attracted her to the forbidden relationship, but it wasn’t long before she saw him for what he truly was— a washed up gym teacher.

You. Have you ever been involved in an affair? How did it end? Share your experiences with us!